Sunday, August 13, 2006

Ranting Online

I have a difficult time using this blog. Whenever there is something negative that I want to talk about I have to be worried who may see it and what they will think. I started this blog so that my parents would have some way of seeing pictures and stories of my life across the country, but I'd prefer not to give them any more reason to worry. Also, J knows about this blog, so that severly cuts down on things I can complain about.

But here goes anyway.

I'm sick of people asking if I'm engaged yet.

I know that it is mostly my own fault because me and J have been talking about it for a while and it is more a question of 'when' than 'if'. I know it is also my fault because I got scared and worried if I was too young for that kind of commitment a year ago, and were it not for that--we'd already be engaged. It is also my fault because (as you might have surmised from the previous post) I am a homebody and don't have much to talk about aside from J. I even understand that you are curious--hell, I'm curious. But it is still frustrating.

First of all, I want everyone to know that WERE I engaged we would have a phone call sounding something like this:

Me: Hi so-and-so! Guess what?
You: Hi Elise! What?
Me: I'm engaged!

I promise it will be OBVIOUS. I will not chat for an hour with you and then when you ask "So are you engaged yet?" say "OH YEAH...I completely forgot. He actually proposed 3 weeks ago."

Second of all, asking does not help. If you ask me when we are getting engaged, it only brings up my own frustration with the whole situation (because of the many reasons I blame myself for the question listed above). This leads to fights with J over why we are not engaged. Fights over not being engaged lead to J feeling that I am "pressuring" him. J feeling that I am "pressuring" him leads to him not proposing because he wants to do it when it is a surprise for me and not forced upon him.

I can't fault you for asking, though, because if I were to eliminate the 'fight with J' step then asking wouldn't have any consequences.

And, to be honest, the fight with J step wasn't just caused by questions. It was also triggered by friends getting engaged who have been dating for less than 1/3 of the time we have.

So I guess the long and short of it is that no one did anything wrong but I would appreciate if you would just wait until I tell you it happened.

Blogs I Read

The blogs I read fit into one or more of 3 categories: (1) blogs of people I know, (2) blogs of people who knit, and (3) blogs of asian-white couples with children. Of the blogs I read, only 2 (one being John's) do not have children.

At the pool party yesterday I was chatting about my knitting projects and explained that I have several baby projects because it seems that the majority of our friends are pregnant or recently had their first child. The woman I was talking to asked if I felt that I didn't have anything to talk about with them since I do not have children. I find that, in reality, the reverse is true. I get along well with married couples and couples with children, the people I have more difficulty relating to are people in their 20s (or 30s) who go out to bars and clubs multiple times per week.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Baby Blanket Complete

The baby blanket is complete! I decided not to do a yellow border and continue to hope that our friends will have a baby boy! The couple who is expecting are friends of John's, and he has been very bad about getting in touch with them. He leaves vague messages like "Just wanted to see how you guys are doing. Give me a call" when messages like "My girlfriend knit your new baby a blanket and would like to give it to you before the baby is born/2 months old" would surely get a better response rate. Let's hope I find out something soon. In the meantime I keep the blanket in the car just in case we stop by or run into them somewhere.

Here is a picture of the blanket (and our resident yarn-lovers) during blocking:

I mentioned that I go to a lot of events with John's firm--but this weekend I seem to be spending a lot of time with people I work with. Yesterday we had a happy hour (which I actually enjoyed) and today I'm off to a pool party. John is, unfortunately, working this weekend so he still doesn't really know anyone I work with.